Thursday, June 07, 2007

Breaking News: Paris Hilton Sprung

RTW News Service. Los Angeles, CA. The title of this post should get RTW a few Google hits, though not from a demographic that is likely to read us.

This just in over the "wires."


RTW has always said, if you are going to get in trouble with the law, the place to do it is California. It apparently helps to have a good lawyer, therapist and accommodating Sheriffs Department.

In the event you don't know what we're talking about, Paris Hilton, heir to the Hilton Hotels family, got sent to the slammer for violating a traffic-court order that she not drive. The Judge made a big deal that she was going to serve the full forty-five day sentence and couldn't serve it in one of California's ritzier (hiltier?) "pay jails." That lasted a week or so when the Sheriff's Department said she'd only serve twenty-three days because of time off for good behavior (how to you get up front "good time" before you've been good to earn it?). It continued to get better for Ms. Hilton. She checked in to the jail late Sunday night after making an appearance at the MTV Awards. Turns out by checking in before midnight, she got a full days credit against the time to be served. Today, she was spirited away from the jail to the palatial Hilton estate to serve the remainder of the "full" sentence - forty days - Noah didn't have it so good. She will have to wear an ankle bracelet as she wanders from room to room to room in the mansion. Why spring her? The Sheriff's Department spokesman wouldn't elaborate; but, the press says she developed an "unknown medical condition." Obviously something that can't be treated other than by her personal physician making mansion calls.

Ah California.


UPDATE. 1:32 p.m. An LATimes headline reports that Ms. Hilton has "been sent to her room" for further punishment. RTW has learned that Paris will not be relegated to the Hilton estate. Her sentence will be served by confinement in her 2700 s.f., three bedroom, three bath home in a gated community in the Hollywood Hills which she purchased in 2005 for $3.1 million. RTW assumes that the gates have bars in them. The bungalow is equipped with a media room, pool, Baccarat crystal chandelier, 400 s.f. closet and a "pet living area" complete with pink pillows for the pets. RTW regrets calling the cozy pad a mansion.

13 comments:

Keith said...

Go figure! Only in California. California is where my ex is. She's been married and divorced several times.

I can't say I hate all of California though. My wife and I do enjoy going to the beach in San Diego to get out of the desert heat. We're heading there in August. It will be our 20th wedding anniversary too. Must be doing something right!

Dave said...

I think I-10 runs straight from AZ to Hollywood. Run past the new "jail cell" compound and see what's up.

Knock knock - it's cancer! said...

Dave - I heard about this while I was at work. I am so not surprised. It's funny how much of a joke this has become....

So 'house arrest' you say...interesting. Just stay in the mansion? They'll bring you food, and videos, your pets, friends, phone, internet, tv are all there...just stay there! Doing hard time, indeed. THAT'll for sure teach her not to drink and drive. Pfffft!

Anonymous said...

She's back in.

Anonymous said...

They're calling her the new Mona Lisa on the Washington post. She can _have_ the position.

But someone should break it to her that lanky chicks look retarded all decked out like baby dolls. Who's her stylist, anyhow?

JLee said...

I couldn't believe this when I heard it...well, I guess I can. O.J. is from Cali too after all ;)

Anonymous said...

You know what really gets me? How come she is so messed up about it? It's just a little over a month? I'd think it would be a great time to get some reading done.

Some people are used to getting their way because the guys want sexual favors from them.

I guess books scare them.

Dave said...

Hey Anonoumi, if that's how you spell the plural, and Jlee, and those that come more regularly,

Thanks for stopping and commenting.

I'm going to do a post today or over the weekend on the legal aspects of the case. Short story: I don't know California law; but, if she had been sentenced in Georgia, the Sheriff was entitled to do what he did.

On that note, I did, with guilt, think it was funny that she left the courtroom today crying and yelling "Mom, it's not fair."

Anonymous said...

That's Anonoumus to you;).

Knock knock - it's cancer! said...

Well Dave, with all the exitement about Paris Hilton, what do you think about the latest news? Going back to jail?

Monica said...

I worked at the D.A.'s office in California in the early 90s. I met Marcia Clark before the O.J. trial--she was a classmate of one of the prosecutors and they were friends. A lot of people laugh about her but she was the driving force behind getting it illegal for the DMV to give out personal information after the murder of Rebecca Shaeffer...she also was the prosecutor who got that lowlife murderer convicted.

As for Paris, well, I really don't care; she has as much priority on my mind as whether the Queen is serving tea at 2 or 4 or whenever.

I get breaking news alerts and have been since the Iraq war started and my oldest was deployed. But my idea of news and theirs is different...she's not news.

Have a great day. :)

dr sardonicus said...

Nothing like a Paris Hilton post to beef up the stats...

Kiyotoe said...

it hurt my heart to actually post about this but i had to. It was so blatant and ridiculous when it happened.

And then she got sent back kicking and screaming.......

it was a beautiful thing.